Skee-Ball

Whenever I use the phrase “my head just exploded”, I’m picturing this.  Forward to 8:24-ish for actual exploding head.

“My head just exploded” can be used in several contexts. It’s easily adaptable, as it can convey utter disgust (like in the clip), insane awesomeness, or to describe an otherwise indescribable thing/event/comment/etc.

I went on to the Bravo website this morning to see if there was a picture of Albie in a cop uniform read the NJ Housewife blogs, and happened upon this clip. *In Katt Williams voice* Go ahead, I’ll wait.

I really don’t care much for Ashley, so pretty much all I heard and thought during the first part was words words words blah blah blah stop wearing that fucking hat you idiot words words words bullshit bullshit bullshit  and then….

Dun dun DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN.

Those people have a fucking skee-ball machine in their house.

In. Their. House.

I didn’t know this was a possibility or even an option.  I just assumed the first skee-ball maker drew up a contract (and stamped it with melting red candle wax) that said, “These machines shall never be utilized in one’s own home.  Their use is only intended in settings such as Chuck E. Cheese and I’m rich bitch honk honk or Riverboat Playhouse.”

You bet your ass I’m going to be playing the lotto now. Suddenly, I want to become rich just to purchase said machine.  Screw paying bills, putting my kid through college or buying a house.  Where can I get me one of those?

Cue to a week from now, when the boys come home and find no furniture, no televisions, bare cabinets, all jewelry gone, drawers empty. Those things that roll down the street in Western movies will be rolling down our hallway. Chester will have “FOR SALE” spray painted on his coat.

Where’d the bed go, they’ll wonder.  But then they’ll hear the glorious sound of the wooden ball rolling up towards the hole (that’s what she said). 

And finally, in a Chris Rock voice I’ll say, “We may not have a bed, but we do have this,” and I’ll do the Chris Rock smile and Vanna White hand gesticulation towards the machine. 

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One Response to “Skee-Ball”

  1. Rosemi Says:

    Riverboat Playhouse!

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